To be happy, we must admit women and men aren’t ‘equal’

Men as an accessory
Odessa Beauty

I was listening to a debate on AM radio about this article and I decided to share it with you.  After I read it I thought that this just about sums up what I think; I share it in its entirety:

To be happy, we must admit women and men aren’t ‘equal’

By Suzanne Venker, Published February 05, 2013,

Norman Vincent Peale, author of “The Power of Positive Thinking,” once wrote these words: “Change your thoughts, and you change your world.”

His statement is highlighted at the beginning of my new book, “How to Choose a Husband and Make Peace with Marriage.” Its premise is that if women want to be successful in love, they should reject the cultural script they’ve been sold and adopt a whole new view of men and marriage.

As products of divorce, the modern generation has few role models for lasting love. That alone is a problem. But young women have an added burden: they’ve been raised in a society that eschews marriage. They’ve been taught instead to honor sex, singlehood and female empowerment.

Consider this statement by Rebecca Traister in Marie Claire: “The world as we’ve known it for a very long time—one in which a woman’s value was tied to her role as a wife—is ending, right in front of us. It is now standard for a woman to spend years on her own, learning, working, earning, socializing, having sex, and yes, having babies in the manner she—and she alone—sees fit. We are living through the invention of independent female adulthood.”

This message is not an anomaly; the idea that women don’t need men or marriage is palpable. It began in earnest more than forty years ago, with the modern feminist movement. Feminists assured women their efforts would result in more satisfying marriages, but the result is something else altogether. It looks something like this:

1. Women postpone marriage indefinitely and move in and out of intense romantic relationships, or even live with their boyfriends for years at a time. Eventually, their biological clocks start ticking and many decide they better hurry up and get married to provide a stable home for their yet-to-be-born children. Trouble is, their boyfriend’s not willing to commit.

2. Marriage becomes a competitive sport. The complementary nature of marriage—in which two people work together, as equals, toward the same goal but with an appreciation for the qualities each gender brings to the table—has been obliterated. Today, husbands and wives are locked in a battle about whom does more on the home front and how they’re going to get everything done. That’s not a marriage. That’s war.

It’s time to say what no one else will: Feminism didn’t result in equality between the sexes – it resulted in mass confusion. Today, men and women have no idea who’s supposed to do what.

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Prior to the 1970s, people viewed gender roles as as equally valuable. Many would argue women had the better end of the deal! It’s hard to claim women were oppressed in a nation in which men were expected to stand up when a lady enters the room or to lay down their lives to spare women life. When the Titanic went down in 1912, its sinking took 1,450 lives. Only 103 were women. One-hundred three.

Compare that with last year’s wrecked cruise line, the Costa Concordia. It resulted in fewer deaths, but there was another significant difference. “There was no ‘women and children first’ policy. There were big men, crew members, pushing their way past us to get into the lifeboats. It was disgusting,” said passenger Sandra Rogers, 62.

The captain of the ship agrees. In USA Today, Francesco Schettino was asked about his New Year’s resolution. He responded, “Bone up on the parts about ‘women and children first’ and ‘the captain goes down with his ship.’”

You see, the problem with equality is that it implies two things are interchangeable – meaning one thing can be substituted for the other with no ramifications. That is what feminists would have us believe, and anyone who contradicts this dogma is branded sexist.

But the truth must be heard. Being equal in worth, or value, is not the same as being identical, interchangeable beings. Men and women may be capable of doing many of the same things, but that doesn’t mean they want to. That we don’t have more female CEOs or stay-at-home dads proves this in spades.

Unless, of course, you’re beholden to feminism. In that case, you’ll believe the above is evidence of discrimination. You’ll believe what feminists taught you to believe: that gender is a social construct.

Those of us with children know better. We know little girls love their dolls and boys just want to kick that ball. This doesn’t mean men can’t take care of babies or women can’t play sports. It just means each gender has its own energy that flows in a specific direction. For God’s sake, let it flow.

The battle of the sexes is over. And guess what? No one won. Why not try something else on for size? Like this: men and women are equal, but different. They’ve each been blessed with amazing and unique qualities that they bring to the table. Isn’t it time we stopped fussing about who brought what and simply enjoy the feast?

Suzanne Venker is a vice president at the The Center for Marriage Policy and has written extensively about politics, parenting, and the influence of feminism on American society. Her latest book, “How to Choose a Husband and Make Peace with Marriage,” is now available at Amazon. Also available is her new Kindle Single, “The War on Men.” For more on Suzanne, visit and

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Men as an accessory
Odessa Beauty

27 thoughts on “To be happy, we must admit women and men aren’t ‘equal’

  1. All so true. It’s funny how most of the credentialed experts who are claiming that feminism has destroyed marriage and the family unit are mostly female. The female intellects (who are more about honoring the truth than political correctness) know this is true.

    Americans have been brought up with feminism in their culture so most guys don’t know any different, they don’t recognize what a relationship and marriage is like with women not brought up within the US system of feminism’s constructs and its double standards. I fully document and source all the experts, stats, and facts at my website that show these differences and how experts now conclude that feminism has destroyed the honorable institutions of marriage and family in this country. Most (*not all of course) western women of today are selfish and lack honorable family values. The average western male has been emasculated to such an extent by masculined westerrn women that a new word has come about to describe these new age men,…. manginas. When western men experience dating and relationships with non western woman they are forever changed. And with few exceptions , they won’t go back to dating western women. Guys, don’t be a mangina. Go get some real life experience dating women from abroad. You will see the light.

    • Steve, I’ll have to admit, I didn’t know how pussified we were until I went East. When you see what a Russian (or Ukrainian or Belarus Woman) expects of you, you see that you are expected to “man up.” Russian women are no pushovers; they are feminine but they are strong. They are content to play their role and aren’t worried about competing with men. Kinda like a tight end who is happy not to be the quarterback. Feminists teach all women (and girls) that they MUST be the quarterback. And men are led to believe that this is normal. I’ve tried to explain this to Alana and she doesn’t get it. When she visits America, I’m sure she will be in for a shock. She told me the other night over dinner, “Why would a woman want to compete with a man? Let him have the hard work.”

  2. Have you noticed how many babies being born these days are girls? No one knows why, but what this does mean is that in the future, the gender imbalance will finally skew towards men. Then, these women will get a sense of what competition will be like!

    Too bad it hasn’t happened in my lifetime. I hear that on college campuses, this is already starting to manifest itself. The shortage of men in some campuses means that women are starting to see a new reality. These young lads are getting a lot more sex and hook-ups. Too bad these young lads lack the context and wisdom of the preceding generation of men.

    • Not sure if more babies born are girls or if it is urban rumor. There are more women going to college now than men – I suppose it will be a buyers market for young men looking for easy sex.

      • ok, i’m a Christian man so I think along Christian lines (yes I know not popular with most ) yet the bible does say in the end times women will out number men 7 to 1 …isn’t it interesting what your comment was about….

        • Once again, I find a comment that seems to have little meaning or make no sense. Help us out here Phil, what are you really trying to say?

          The problem with the Old Testament passages is that many of them refer to times that have already passed. Many of them are prophecies for the old tribes of Judea, not for modern day Westerners. We (humans) always like to think that our time is the most important, our generation is the greatest & that every prophecy in the past talks about our time. As for the 7:1 ratio, there are endless debates as to what this means. If we are looking for a time when there were 7 women for every man, we need look no farther than WWII era England. Those Yank soldiers found such fertile grounds and earned the complaint of many Britons, “They’re over paid, they’re oversexed and they’re over here!”

          If we are going to look to the bible for guidance on this whole subject (Western Women Suck) we should see that THROUGHOUT the Bible, woman is commanded to follow her Husband. Man is commanded to treat his wife with respect and to protect her. When I look at so many feminist men-bashing websites, I can’t honestly believe that this is the way that God would want it LOL.

    • There are scientists that say a lot of things, what is your point?

      If youbelieve that people aren’t meant to be monogamous, then don’t get married. There are plenty of “career women” in America to sleep with – you’ll make out fine.

  3. You sure hit the nail on the head. We can have equal rights but in fact women and men are NOT equal for sure. Each gender has it’s role in society and that’s what the feminists just don’t get. Women in other countries just seem to “get it”. My wife is Dominican and I would not trade her for 10 American women. I don’t even look at women here. Thanks for putting up this site and spreading the word!


    • Tim ol’ boy you wouldn’t need to trade your girl for 10 American women. 1 American women will do because she is the same size as 10 well-built girls – except instead of muscle-tone you get pig fat.

  4. Ah, the truth…

    But the truth must be heard. Being equal in worth, or value, is not the same as being identical, interchangeable beings. Men and women may be capable of doing many of the same things, but that doesn’t mean they want to. That we don’t have more female CEOs or stay-at-home dads proves this in spades.

    …had to express this view the other day with one of my friends. In all relationships especially long term dating and marriage, one submits and the other dominates; as a real man I refuse to submit.

    • It is now being taught in the Universities, especially in Gender Studies classes that Men and women are biologically the same. That the ONLY difference is in the “plumbing.” And we now see as a result so many Men who look like women and vice versa. But you can’t change nature.

      • Yes…another reason I decided not to pursue the path of becoming a university professor after finishing my graduate studies…even though I earned my degree earlier than my classmates and was encouraged by my professors from undergrad and grad to go further…I said “no thanks and goodbye”

  5. Even I don’t agree with everything this guy writes or says. I 100 percent agree with his view on the MRM in the US. Stop letting women infiltrate your groups! Especially western women they are Trojan Horses.

    Roosh on youtube…
    The Men’s Rights Movement Is Making A Huge Mistake
    This is the end of the y0utube url –> /watch?v=vTg_t7bPgQM

  6. Hey Seeker, thanks for sharing this Youtube link. For me to watch this, I found that it could be of great educational value to guys who want to know more about the mindset of Ukr ladies. This guy Roosh, is the biggest dickhead, and an embarrassment to my country. I love how the moderator would slip in a few bashings, and of course, the ladies bashed him, especially the one who read her lawsuit to him. As I have written here before many times, in general, you just can’t go to Ukraine and within 1 or 2 weeks, expect to meet and marry the love of your life. From this clip, you can see, that the ladies are modest, shy and humble. That’s why I’ve said, its best to meet them in person, naturally, through a friend, or trusted person who lives there. I love how when the moderator asked all the ladies, what kind of chance would Roosh have, if they met him in a club, and he tried to seduce them? Their answer was instant. Zero chance. So, guys, take 30 min to watch and learn some insights into the minds of Ukr ladies with the clip Seeker provided. BTW, you will also refreshingly see just how striking and gorgeous all the ladies are, in their normal, daily attire.

    • Hey all, I found another good video by Roosh. His confession that he did not have a single one-night stand in Ukraine for the 6 months he was there. So, I don’t know why he wrote a book called, “Bang Ukraine,” when he admitted he couldn’t get a single one night stand! I’m glad because experience just continues to solidify what I had already known about Ukr ladies. It’s normally not going to happen in a one night stand. You have to work for your supper. You have to court her, show attention, and then, very naturally, she will open up to you.

      • If you watch some of his other videos he admits that outside of the Anglosphere it gets very hard to one night stand young women even in many parts of post modern Western Europe because they approach sexual relationships logically not emotionally like American women. They consider the consequences of their sexual relationships. Surprise. Surprise. You didn’t here about hordes of one night stands occurring in Argentina or Ukraine compared to the UK or the US. Surprise. Surprise.

    • These young women are so beautiful it hurts. It’s very surprising to see such a large variety of looks and physical features in such a small country. I have to agree Ukraine and the rest of FSU are rare gems especially if these sweet ladies have such high morals. Beautiful on the outside and beautiful on the inside. Like I said before, I have tendency to not hang out with people from my own country while overseas. I heard it before and seen in it with my own eyes before when outside the US… shamefully bad behavior. The #1 rule when overseas is that you cannot rock the boat, especially when it comes to respecting the social mores of that society you are visiting. As a guest you are already given several yards but many westerners go 100 miles and ruin it for other future visitors.

      • As always Seeker, well said. I did watch another of his videos where he commented that he lived in Kharkov for 6 months and never experienced a one night stand. I was a bit shocked, but equally proud of these gems, as you called them. I guess I was put off the moment I saw the title of his book, “Bang Ukraine.” I take such things personally, as I should, with my background of living there and marrying one of their gems. When I was running my own agency, I personally ended and terminated two men from further contact with us, due to their low morals.

        • I agree. If someone is looking for flings or short term dates, they should not be using an agency, when it’s clear that the people who join (men and women) are seeking marriage. The guys that have low morals are no different than the letter writing and marriage agency scams that rob guys of their hard earned money…but then again maybe even worse since a young women only has so much time to seek a husband in her prime years 19 to 29. She can’t afford to have her time wasted or her reputation ruined because a couple jerks acted like they were interested in marriage but were just using her for sex. Just my two cents…just because most of the western women are garbage and treated these guys like crap in their own country is not an excuse to deceive the girls in South America or Eastern Europe…they have nothing to do with that feminist BS they are trying to escape.

          • thank you i agree with 99% of all this, I’m glad to know I m not the only one who notice. I notice, how north American values and ethics are corrupted from the feminist movement. when I visited foreign countries women were able to respect and much more. now I’m back i have a hard time looking at these americunts.

  7. Some interesting points were made in this video…stating that there is no distinction between the mind and the body. Men and women will react to mental stimuli differently…whether it’s gaming, intelligence tests, chess, card games, engineering, etc….just like men and women physically react differently to physical stimuli…whether it’s fighting, sports, working with your hands, exposure to extreme weather conditions, etc.

    Physiology of Intelligence

    I believe this is the big reason why they — insert your conspirator(s) — are trying to re-engineer the education system and workplace environment in the west. One of the reasons we are dumber and less productive than we use to be.

    Another point…women are just better at dealing with small children and babies than men…but they don’t want to believe that either until it’s time for divorce, child custody battle, alimony, child support, etc…

    • Hi Seeker,
      Interesting video(s). I find more and more that I myself am have to rewire the way I think to get past the the PC crap I have been fed my whole life. I have had to change my way of thinking and reacting even with my fiance. Luckily she is patient with me…lol.

      But I got a double dose of good news in the last two weeks. On almost the same day my fiance and I found out that her visa application was approved and that she is pregnant with our child!….Now that was an eventful day….hahaha

      • Hi John,
        Congratulations! I wish you two the best — a happy couple with healthy children.
        Glad you like the vids. I have to think that myself sometimes…how would I view this stuff if I had been raised in a male dominated culture instead of the west.
        I mean it would have to be a tough decision for a man from a male dominated culture to have to move to (and put up with a) feminist culture for economic or political reasons.
        Back to good news…congratulations.

      • Shout out to John! Congratulations on your double dose of news! Your family is your sanctuary and you’ll see that your future Ukrainian wife will make you a happy man, husband and home. Cheers!

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